I think this posting will be rather different from most postings. My question is aimed at how singles should approach dating abroad. I am asking whether people have found any particular characteristics of international schools that make them favorable for dating. It could be school size, continents or countries, on-line services, etc. How do singles in their 20's or 30's evaluate international schools or simply decide that they need to pack-up for home?
Short background: I came into international teaching to try a new angle on teaching. I thought I would find someone of like interests, but I found small schools and generally reclusive people. Not being very overly outgoing, I am wondering what is the best route to take if I keep teaching abroad.
Global dating
Dating
When you look at dating overseas, you need to look at the issue from a variety of angles:
1) What country are you in, and what is your gender? Single western females tend to struggle in Asia, whereas both genders can date locals in places like Latin America. If you're open to dating people of other ethnicities and nationalities, then what school you work at doesn't matter much.
2) Dating someone you work with can really be a mistake; at every school I've worked at there's always been a "Cassanova" who dates a few ladies on staff, and by the end of the first semester this has caused undue havoc in the workplace. On a professional level, unless you're absolutely crazy about someone, its best to keep your work and private life separate.
3) I've worked at three good international schools, and they've all hired more couples than singles...that's just the way it works. A school is hiring you to teach, not to date, and the school isn't in charge of your social life: you are. You have to be ready for the fact that being single abroad can be lonely.
1) What country are you in, and what is your gender? Single western females tend to struggle in Asia, whereas both genders can date locals in places like Latin America. If you're open to dating people of other ethnicities and nationalities, then what school you work at doesn't matter much.
2) Dating someone you work with can really be a mistake; at every school I've worked at there's always been a "Cassanova" who dates a few ladies on staff, and by the end of the first semester this has caused undue havoc in the workplace. On a professional level, unless you're absolutely crazy about someone, its best to keep your work and private life separate.
3) I've worked at three good international schools, and they've all hired more couples than singles...that's just the way it works. A school is hiring you to teach, not to date, and the school isn't in charge of your social life: you are. You have to be ready for the fact that being single abroad can be lonely.
I have worked in Asia and the Middle East. From what I have seen, Western women in the ME can date the locals (although I personally would not recommend it) but Western men never seem to date local women. I guess it must somewhat inappropriate in their culture.
In Asia, it's very much the opposite. Western men date local women quite frequently and I have been invited to several weddings as a result! I know of a few women who date the local men but it is not as common.
As far as meeting someone special via your job... well wouldn't that be nice! I think many of us have had the fantasy at some point that we would meet Mr. or Mrs. Right on the international job circuit. How great it would be to meet & fall in love with someone who shared such an interest and then you could do international teaching together. Although I know of some people that this happened to, it's not that common either, unfortuanately.
I wonder if dating is easier for international teachers... say.... in Eastern or Western Europe. I would assume so.
In Asia, it's very much the opposite. Western men date local women quite frequently and I have been invited to several weddings as a result! I know of a few women who date the local men but it is not as common.
As far as meeting someone special via your job... well wouldn't that be nice! I think many of us have had the fantasy at some point that we would meet Mr. or Mrs. Right on the international job circuit. How great it would be to meet & fall in love with someone who shared such an interest and then you could do international teaching together. Although I know of some people that this happened to, it's not that common either, unfortuanately.
I wonder if dating is easier for international teachers... say.... in Eastern or Western Europe. I would assume so.
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teacher_asia
- Posts: 6
- Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2007 8:33 pm
- Location: Asia
It also depends significantly on the country and culture you are in, and what you are looking for.
Although it may be easier for single males in Asia to find a "date", if your looking for something meaningful, single guys in some Asian countries can be as frustrated as single females.
Cultural differences can be challenging to the point of making anything long lasting unrealistic, particularly in the East Asian countries, Japan, China and Korea.
Although you may get a lot of attention, and opportunities for dating are not that hard to come by, I know of many single guys who have had strings of short relationships, ending in confusion and frustration from cultural diffferences, and cultural expectations.
Remember, if you date someone in another country/culture, you are the person who is expected to understand how things work, know the expectations, and adapt. This is a real challenge, particularly when those expectations are not well known, nor communicated by the partner involved.......
I've known lots of singles, males and females, even those who admire Asians, who have decide to go back home, and find a partner there, even an Asian one. Their thinking is that cultural issues might be less of a problem there, understandably.......
I hope this helps!
(this post is starting to look like Dear Abby :-)
Although it may be easier for single males in Asia to find a "date", if your looking for something meaningful, single guys in some Asian countries can be as frustrated as single females.
Cultural differences can be challenging to the point of making anything long lasting unrealistic, particularly in the East Asian countries, Japan, China and Korea.
Although you may get a lot of attention, and opportunities for dating are not that hard to come by, I know of many single guys who have had strings of short relationships, ending in confusion and frustration from cultural diffferences, and cultural expectations.
Remember, if you date someone in another country/culture, you are the person who is expected to understand how things work, know the expectations, and adapt. This is a real challenge, particularly when those expectations are not well known, nor communicated by the partner involved.......
I've known lots of singles, males and females, even those who admire Asians, who have decide to go back home, and find a partner there, even an Asian one. Their thinking is that cultural issues might be less of a problem there, understandably.......
I hope this helps!
(this post is starting to look like Dear Abby :-)