The International Schools Review Forum

What kind of parents annoy me?

The abusive kind. The ones that I can't have an honest conversation about thier child's progress with because I think they'll beat the kid if they find out he's struggling. Usually, we teachers learn who these parents are early in the year - when the child comes to school after an obvious beating the day after I've contacted the parent about a behavior or academic issue. It makes me feel helpless and sorry for the child. Unfortunately, three of the four countries I've taught in had no child protection laws, or I would have not have hesitated to report such parents.

On alighter note, the moms who don't have jobs or hobbies and just hang around the school all day long every day are supremely annoying. They press their faces to the window of my door or hand-feed their children at lunch or try to tell the teachers how to do things. If you are one of these parents, please beware that even though you have the good fortune to have a rich husband so you don't have to work and you can devote all your attention to your child, the teachers don't envy you, they feel sorry for you and think you're pathetic. If you have that much free time, go to the spa. Then we'll be envious.

Just be nice. Email, phone, press your face against the window of my classroom or whatever. Just be nice, that'll do. Gifts are great - everybody loves gifts.

Dear Universal Parent,

Thank you for asking! I thought this was a question from a teacher who needed to vent; it was refreshing to hear it is from a parent.

Gifts bother me personally. I worry that the parent is trying to buy a good grade. That's just me. I have seen other teacher who accept small gifts, such as food, and that does not bother me. It seems an innocent gesture of goodwill. On the other hand, I have also seen teachers accept things like expensive jewelry and airline tickets. RED ALERT!

Please, please, DO contact me! I love to hear from parents. If there is a misconception about something that was said or that might have happened in the classroom, I would prefer it be straightened out rather than have the parent spend the school year worrying about it and resenting me, especially if the incident was not quite as reported! Write a note, call me, come on in to see me. I am here to make sure your child receives the absolute best education I can provide and your support is vital.

Volunteering? I prefer parents who can commit to a schedule. This way, the students know who to expect and I can count on someone being there. I am also better able to assign tasks if I can count on a parent being in the class on a regular basis. Parents who just happen to drop in to assist too often have been a distraction. On the other hand, if I can count on you to be in the room for one hour every Monday morning or if I know you will be there from 1 PM to 3 PM every Tuesday and Thursday, I can plan how best you can help. Yes, please! I would love to have you in my class, but on a consistent basis.

The type of parent that annoys me most is the one who will not contact the teacher if they have a concern but who will contact other parents in the room and actively work to undermine the teacher's authority in the classroom. This is a total disservice to both the school and the child. Too often I have seen parents behave in this manner. Their children then go to school and repeat everything their parents say at home. The teacher then has difficulty controlling behaviors in the classroom and this creates a less than optimal learning environment.

Thank you again for a very interesting question. I hope the replies you receive are helpful and polite!