All the single ladies

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desertlife
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Joined: Mon Sep 04, 2017 12:46 pm

All the single ladies

Post by desertlife »

So my question:

What area of the world is best for single women in terms of dating culture, variety in the expat pool, etc.

I’m 29 years old, entering my second year internationally at a small school in North Africa. I love my coworkers, especially my administration, but I’m still considering a move next year mostly because of the utter lack of dating prospects and overall social life. Obviously I didn’t take this job with the intention of finding a husband but now that I’m out of my first year I am beginning to think about my long term needs.

There is a very limited population of expat men in my community and even fewer that we might call “eligible” single men while there are a LOT of us single ladies. I’m not just talking about coworkers either (though ideally I’d meet a fellow educator while abroad!). Where I live there aren’t many single men who speak any English period.

In discussions with my single female colleagues this seems to be a common issue no matter where they’ve work so I’m wondering is this just the deal for international education all over the world? Are there schools that *aren’t* 90% female?
PsyGuy
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Post by PsyGuy »

Sure lots of places. LOS (Thailand) for instance has closer to a 90% male expat population, lots of single expat guys there. Its pretty high in Japan as well, not that it would do you any good or mean anything for you, those guys arent interested in expat woman, its one of the reasons they left whatever part of the west they came from. Those guys are all interested in the local Asian woman. Its just the state of IE where the white guy is king. Asia is particularly bad for expat women, as most Asian men want nothing to do with a foreign IT, they just wont fit into the family structure or the cultural expectations.
If you want English speaking westerners you need to go to AUS/CAN/US/UK. Female ITs do best with the local population in the LCSA, though you may have issues with monogamy in the machismo culture that you find unacceptable.
vandsmith
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Joined: Sat Oct 25, 2014 12:16 am

Re: All the single ladies

Post by vandsmith »

lots of european countries you'd also find fairly good pool. a number of my colleagues have local boyfriends or husbands. depending on where you're from, attitudes and cultural norms towards women are fairly liberal/progressive. for example, US, AUS, CAN colleagues have no issues here iin WE finding a partner(s).

good luck!

v.
chilagringa
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Re: All the single ladies

Post by chilagringa »

Latin America is good for dating, although it is easiest if you date among the middle class / educated class as the upper and lower classes can have wildly different values. And, contrary to popular opinion, not all latinos cheat. Most of my post-college dating experience has been in various Latin American countries (I have spent most of my career here), and although I've had occasional problems with machismo with one or two guys, overall I think Latin American men are wonderful and much more relationship-oriented than North Americans (minus Mexico).
chilagringa
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Re: All the single ladies

Post by chilagringa »

Oh, just to add onto that, it helps A LOT if you become fluent in the local language. (Yes, fluent! Yes, it is possible! It just takes work.) From what I've seen, that opens the dating pool from the "I want to date an exotic and possibly easy foreigner" gang to the "normal guys who want to date someone they care about" gang.
PsyGuy
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Post by PsyGuy »

@vandsmith

I agree, I neglected to include the WE when stating western regions, however outside the UK, language can be a barrier.

@chilagringa

Not ALL latinos are cheats, but its a higher proportion than average. Yes, it helps greatly to become fluent in the language, but that is true everywhere, and would likely significantly change the dating pool where the LW is currently located. My impression is the LW wants a gent who speaks English.
chilagringa
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Re: All the single ladies

Post by chilagringa »

Most educated people in Latin America speak good English, but you STILL are likely to attract a higher quality dating pool even among English-speaking guys because they will take you more seriously if you speak their language. It just makes you seem more serious about living there, and a lot of guys who want serious relationships don't want someone who's there for an "adventure".
PsyGuy
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Post by PsyGuy »

@chilagringa

Again, language fluency is a strong advantage to relationships everywhere.
chilagringa
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Re: All the single ladies

Post by chilagringa »

Wait... so... we are agreeing.
PsyGuy
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Post by PsyGuy »

@chilagringa

Yes, I agreed with you 4 messages ago. I clarified though, that language fluency would be a benefit anywhere, including the LWs current location, but the LW didnt seem interested in learning the local language regardless of where she goes.
bish180b
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Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2012 5:54 pm

Re: All the single ladies

Post by bish180b »

Agrentina
Brazil
Cuba
Australia
Lastname_Z
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Re: All the single ladies

Post by Lastname_Z »

Big cities in China like Shanghai or Beijing have MASSIVE amounts of expats due to the amount of multinational corporations and international schools. You would have no trouble.
PsyGuy
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Post by PsyGuy »

@Lastname_Z

Strongly disagree, its not the size of the expat community but eligible expats. Most of those eligible guys are interested in Asian woman, not other expats.
nathan61
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Re: All the single ladies

Post by nathan61 »

Dubai. Lots of expats and there is no local dating pool.
PsyGuy
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Post by PsyGuy »

@Lastname_Z

I would concur with @nathan61 that there is no local dating pool, but my experience (and its a bit dated for the region) is that there just isnt much of a dating pool at all, at least not for serious long term relationships.
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