I have interviewed twice with my dream school and after the second interview they told me that they are interested and began to check my references, which has been confirmed by my references. I have very strong references from both my current and former admin.
No offer has come from my dream school, but an offer has come from my 2nd choice school. Do I email my dream school and let them know that I have an another offer on the table and would like to know if they are going to make an offer before I decide on my 2nd choice school?
I asked for 48 hours to think over their offer before I decide and wanted to give my dream school some time to come to a decision on me. I don't want to burn any bridges, but if the dream school isn't ready to make a decision on me then I want to move forward with the school that is.
Anyone else ever face this? What were some positive ways that you handled it?
What to do? What to do?
I would certainly let Dream School know you have a firm offer but they are your first choice. They may be dithering over two candidates as you are dithering over two schools.
But I think you need to really reflect on job #2--will you be satisfied accepting the job, even if DS comes through later? You have to know your boundaries and know if you will be happy at #2 no matter what. I wouldn't accept it out of desperation. Make sure you're ready to commit.
But I think you need to really reflect on job #2--will you be satisfied accepting the job, even if DS comes through later? You have to know your boundaries and know if you will be happy at #2 no matter what. I wouldn't accept it out of desperation. Make sure you're ready to commit.
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Happens all the time, its the number one stress for a IT and is magnified at a fair (do you take the offer in hand, or wait on the school that wants more time knowing they have other candidates to interview).
The rule is when a school wants you they really want you. They dont really want you, they want someone else but they havent met of signed a contract with that someone else. Your just one of their backup options.
All of this is about you though not the schools. The only real question to ask yourself is the dream school worth waiting forever and rejecting all other school for? Until you answer that question you cant answer the next question which is school #2 a school i want to be at?
Dont let the school make the decision for you. Contact the school and give them a deadline. Dont tell them why, its irrelevant. Either they want you or they dont.
The rule is when a school wants you they really want you. They dont really want you, they want someone else but they havent met of signed a contract with that someone else. Your just one of their backup options.
All of this is about you though not the schools. The only real question to ask yourself is the dream school worth waiting forever and rejecting all other school for? Until you answer that question you cant answer the next question which is school #2 a school i want to be at?
Dont let the school make the decision for you. Contact the school and give them a deadline. Dont tell them why, its irrelevant. Either they want you or they dont.
Nothing wrong with honesty and I'm sure both of your schools will appreciate you more for it.
Totally disagree that you are not their first choice. You have no real way of knowing that. Even if a school wants you I am sure that they have protocol that they have to follow before they offer you a job.
How very exciting for you.
Totally disagree that you are not their first choice. You have no real way of knowing that. Even if a school wants you I am sure that they have protocol that they have to follow before they offer you a job.
How very exciting for you.
Well, PsyGuy was right. I was not their first choice. One of the reasons they gave me was that they felt we would struggle on one salary for a family of four in Western Germany. While I wish they were more upfront about that earlier in the process I was grateful for the info as it has shed light on one of my concerns above moving to/living in Europe.
Maybe one day...
Maybe one day...
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shadowjack
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- Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2012 9:49 am
Haven't accepted it. Still thinking it over. I have a good gig now and can resign for another 2 years. I'm in Japan and my wife and I like Japan. It's very safe here.
The dream school position was only for 1 year to cover a maturnity leave. It was nice to be considered by the school as they contacted me about the position. It's a school in Germany and I've always wanted to live there. Maybe one day...
We'll probably stay put here for another 2 years, but I've still got interviews lined up so we'll see what happens. The offer, school and country have to wow me before I pull the trigger on any move.
Generally speaking, what region are you heading for? Congrats by the way. I followed your BKK posts. I was slated to go but didn't. We just welcomed our 2nd child in December.
The dream school position was only for 1 year to cover a maturnity leave. It was nice to be considered by the school as they contacted me about the position. It's a school in Germany and I've always wanted to live there. Maybe one day...
We'll probably stay put here for another 2 years, but I've still got interviews lined up so we'll see what happens. The offer, school and country have to wow me before I pull the trigger on any move.
Generally speaking, what region are you heading for? Congrats by the way. I followed your BKK posts. I was slated to go but didn't. We just welcomed our 2nd child in December.
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shadowjack
- Posts: 2140
- Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2012 9:49 am
Congratulations on the birth of number 2! Having 2 kids changes things personally, as it is often twice (or more) the work and takes its toll - but totally worth it!
We are headed for north central Asia and very excited/happy about it.
Good luck with your search - I am sure you will find something! And if not, at least you have the security of a job in hand :-)
We are headed for north central Asia and very excited/happy about it.
Good luck with your search - I am sure you will find something! And if not, at least you have the security of a job in hand :-)
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Sorry, sometimes i hope Im wrong. I dont know what their issue was, and why they couldnt tell you from the start what their problems/issues were instead of just having you wait, when they knew it wasnt going to work. Sadly, it happens all too often.
Wish you would ahve posted more about your resume here, we could have advised you much earlier that a family of 4 in Germany (or WE for that matter) on a single salary was going to be a serious logistical challenge to being hired.
Wish you would ahve posted more about your resume here, we could have advised you much earlier that a family of 4 in Germany (or WE for that matter) on a single salary was going to be a serious logistical challenge to being hired.
I'm not upset over any of it, so no need to be sorry. Like I said, I have an excellent gig now and we like where we live and I love what I do.
I mentioned this but I did not seek them out, they sought me out. They were fully aware that I was a family four. I asked the question during my interview with the principal and she said that we would do quite well and live comfortably. It was the HOS that said that we would struggle when he sent me the "we selected someone else" email.
No hard feelings on my part at all. I would say that the entire process was positive overall.
And no, I turned down the offer from my 2nd choice as well. I'm happy where I am at and as the saying goes, if it isn't broke, why fix it. Japan is an absolutely lovely country.
I mentioned this but I did not seek them out, they sought me out. They were fully aware that I was a family four. I asked the question during my interview with the principal and she said that we would do quite well and live comfortably. It was the HOS that said that we would struggle when he sent me the "we selected someone else" email.
No hard feelings on my part at all. I would say that the entire process was positive overall.
And no, I turned down the offer from my 2nd choice as well. I'm happy where I am at and as the saying goes, if it isn't broke, why fix it. Japan is an absolutely lovely country.
As someone who has lived in both Germany and Japan, I really prefer Japan as a cultural experience and miss it terribly. They are similar in some ways, but there really is a demand that you learn the language here, which is really difficult when holding down a full-time job. In Japan there is a strong understanding that Japanese is difficult and you practically get a standing ovation when you speak a few words of Japanese. In Germany when I speak German I nearly always get told off about how I did it wrong.
The Japanese are polite to a fault. I do agree with you there. It has become one of my favorite countries and I do feel very lucky to have the opportunity to raise a family here. Very safe, even if it is expensive to get around and takes us a while to drive to our nearest airport.
I'm starting to get the feeling, after reading a lot of comments here, that we'll be better off visiting Europe than living in it. We're able to save so much here and still get to travel around. We've been to Korea, Singapore and Thailand and have plans to do visit Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, Australia and New Zealand in the next two years.
Thank you all for the words of encouragement and for sharing your experiences.
I'm starting to get the feeling, after reading a lot of comments here, that we'll be better off visiting Europe than living in it. We're able to save so much here and still get to travel around. We've been to Korea, Singapore and Thailand and have plans to do visit Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, Australia and New Zealand in the next two years.
Thank you all for the words of encouragement and for sharing your experiences.