Change of Marital Status

[hanifa]

Hi

I am currently single and I have been applying to jobs as such. This week I was offered a job in UAE and I accepted. My fiance and I have decided to marry in March 2015. How do I go about addressing this change with my future employer. I do not want them to think I was untruthful or pulled the wool over their eyes. My contract is single status and I would like to consider the option of switching to family status even though when I applied and accepted the offer this was not my status.

In the school's Search Associates profile, they indicate they Prefer Not to hire married couples and only one of whom teaches. Should I wait until I arrive in UAE, pass my probation period, and then try to independently bring over my spouse by applying for the visa and paying for the plane ticket. Or should I be upfront about my future change in marital status and let the chips fall where they do.

Thanks

[wrldtrvlr123]

I would inform them right away, apologize for any inconvenience or miscommunication and reiterate how much you still want to work there.

You may get other opinions but personally I would think that moving to a new country/job and starting a new marriage will be stressful enough. You don't want to have to worry about repercussions or bad feelings by your new employer.

"Prefer not" is not the same as straight out saying they only hire single teachers or teaching couples. If it is going to be a deal breaker, better to know sooner rather than later so you can try and find a job where the school realizes that life happens,

[Cheery Littlebottom]

I am with wrldtrvlr. This is a very big deal indeed. If you turn up married having signed a contract as single you can be in real trouble.
Many schools are duplicitous, but starting your contract whilst covering up a major untruth is probably not the way to go.
Having been hired in the ME, you could also be in definite trouble if you don't get married and your fiancee comes to visit you. I don't know if you realise this, but females visiting a man, or having a man stay with with a woman or visiting women alone, especially if you are in a sponsored housing, can potentially see you in jail.
Maybe I am over-reacting as I have not lived in the UAE but having lived in the ME for a fair stretch, I've know of some very nasty situations along these lines.
Breaches of contract can result in your being fired and your Search Associate not accepting you back as a candidate.
I don't know if this is your first IT gig, but don't start your career badly!
You need to have a very big think about this. Good luck!

[vandsmith]

i don't think it's a deal-breaker as long as you realize that the school won't be sponsoring her residence visa. life happens.

legally, unmarried men and women are not allowed to live together in the uae, although many schools do hire gf/bf tandems.

while i echo what others have said about being upfront about it, technically you're not married yet. it's a fairly straightforward procedure to sponsor your wife to come to uae - just make sure to read the requirements for doing so. she will come on a tourist visa first, then you have a certain amount of time to get her a residence visa (if i remember correctly). assuming you meet all the requirements, fill out the forms and submit them. it might take a while to get all the documents attested but it's doable again, as long as you meet the requirements.

since the school has hired you as a single, they shouldn't care too much about the spouse thing, since you will be sponsoring them. it costs them nothing.

congrats on your new job and new family!

v.

[hanifa]

Hi

Thanks for the honest feedback. To clarify, I am a single, female applicant and while I was indeed single when I signed the offer/contract, when I begin the teaching assignment I will be married. I would like to have my spouse live with me but I do understand that my new employer will not be responsible for his visa/airfare fees due to the fact that I signed the offer/contract as a single applicant.

I guess I didn't want my new employer to think I was dishonest by signing the offer/contract as a single woman and then prior to starting the teaching assignment trying to finagle them into paying for my new husband's visa/airfare fees.

Thanks again

[PsyGuy]

Here are your options:

THE GOOD:

You have to tell them, but they will likely pull the contract. Still it wont be punishable by your agency and youll have plenty of time to look, especially if your willing to go to the UAE. No matter what you say they will think you were hiding it from them. It will incur costs for them such as insurance, guarantee, etc.

THE BAD:

Dont tell them, get married, sponsor your husband once your their and live your life, your not asking anything of them and they dont need to know. If they find out shrug, and say you got married. Once school starts they wont have many options and as long as its not costing them much they wont have many options.

THE UGLY:

Delay your marriage and wedding until after you get their. I strongly have a feeling your staff handbook has a section about wedding and marriage benefits, and your school will have to abide by them, even if they dont want too, because they wont have many options available to them, and getting married is not prohibited by your contract or staff policy. This option allows you to secure more benefits for your husband.

[shadowjack]

The other thing to consider is whether an expat wife can sponsor her husband. Do not assume that is an automatic. You need to check into it. I also think perhaps you might want to delay your wedding until Christmas break or the next summer.

Whatever happens, good luck with the move and with the marriage! Have you lived in the Middle East before?

Cheers,

shad

[hanifa]

Hi

This will be my first experience in the Middle East.

[vandsmith]

expat wives can sponsor husbands. but it's very limited - i think doctors, engineers, and teachers only. otherwise you have to petition the government for an exemption. you also have to make a certain amount a month, which you should if you are a teacher (10 000 dirhams, 9000 if your housing is paid for).

other than the requirement to be one of those 3 professions, it's the same as for a man i think.

v.

[Yantantether]

Just to add: Just because a school says they prefer singles does not mean they will not go with a married teacher if they find one that fits for them. They state that mainly to cover themselves and you, as they probably won't give much out, regarding benefits to a dependent. If you are OK with that and both parties are transparent then nothing lost.

Good luck

[Cheery Littlebottom]

I respect what Vandsmith has said, he probably has more up to date info. As of the last academic year, however, my last location in the ME made it very difficult indeed to have wives sponsor husbands, just make sure you double check. Good luck!